ACCESS ALL AREAS

Wall Street cretins bilk Americans for $700B in bipartisan triumph!

3 October 2008 by Mike Gogulski
Posted in art, crime, economics, politics | 3 Comments »

The House just…

Oh, fuck it. Here, listen to some Exodus, dredged up from memory by the chance linkage of the word “toxic” in the title to the same word appearing in phrases like “toxic debt” in the media this year…

After this, Americans might just want to get right out there and riot like proper victims.

Exodus, “The Toxic Waltz”, from the album Fabulous Disaster:

Here’s a new dance craze that’s sweeping the nation
It’s called the toxic waltz and it’s causing devastation
You’re jumping up and down like a psycho circus clown
Slamming with waltzers all the way around
You get caught up in the whip
You’re thrown into a flip
You aim for someone’s head
To stain the floor red
Give someone a kick
To prove you’re truly sick
Bounce back from some blows
And blood runs out your nose

Flailing round and round
And you’re injury bound
Waltz it up!
The pit is it!
You can take your chance
On this rough new dance
If you dare!
To dive in!
There are some that try
But they won’t survive
They don’t hit!
‘Cause they’re wimps!
And this exercise
Helps you brutalize
With us!
Exodus!

Everybody’s doin’ the toxic waltz
Kick your friend in the head and have a ball
Come on and do the toxic waltz
And slam your partner against the wall
Everybody’s doin’ the toxic waltz
Good friendly violent fun in store for all
Get up off your ass and toxic waltz
If you hit the floor you can always crawl!

Used to do the monkey, but now it’s not cool
The twist and mash potato are no exception to the rule
So don’t be a dunce and dance like a runt
Just throw your elbows with good friendly violent fun
Don’t start to cry
If you get a black eye
Just dive back in
And give another try
But too much action
May leave you in traction
So you better get insurance
No matter your endurance!

Flailing round and round
And you’re injury bound
Waltz it up!
The pit is it!
You can take your chance
On this rough new dance
If you dare!
To dive in!
There are some that try
But they won’t survive
They don’t hit!
‘Cause they’re wimps!
And this exercise
Helps you brutalize
With us!
Exodus!

Everybody’s doin’ the toxic waltz
Kick your friend in the head and have a ball
Come on and do the toxic waltz
And slam your partner against the wall
Everybody’s doin’ the toxic waltz
Good friendly violent fun in store for all
Get up off your ass and toxic waltz
If you hit the floor you can always crawl!

Get up on your feet
Don’t look so obsolete
And thrash like an athlete!
Don’t sit there on your ass
Don’t look like you’ve got too much class
You’ll be harassed!
You know we guarantee
This is the key
So rage or get the third degree!
You begin frontal assaults
And start your somersaults
And do the toxic waltz!
Do the toxic waltz!

  1. 3 Responses to “Wall Street cretins bilk Americans for $700B in bipartisan triumph!”

  2. By MySelfReliance on 4 October 2008

    I love how that first version wasn’t shitty enough, so they loaded it with “sweateners” to make it shitty enough. “Madame Speaker, this doesn’t fuck everyone over enough to secure my vote. Please give my backers something for free so I can get that money in the form of campaign contributions.”

    How can the masses tolerate such audacity and mistreatment? Do we all suffer from battered woman syndrome?

  3. By Mike Gogulski on 4 October 2008

    Stockholm syndrome… or as “Hogeye” Bill Orton calls it, “Stateholm syndrome”…

  4. By Cork on 4 October 2008

    Best opening to a blog post ever.

    It would be awesome if nightly news stories started doing that.

    “Today, John McCain went to….fuck it. Here’s some Megadeth.”


    comments rss Comments RSS

Post a Comment

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

  • Categories

  • Archives

  • Core Dogma